When I saw this ladybird tucked away in this little space in the lid of my compost bin, my first thought was, “What a great place to hibernate without being disturbed” (until someone like me comes along and opens the lid). My second thought was, “How lovely it must be to be able to hide away from everything like that”.

The temptation to do that – to run and hide away – is strong for me right now. I’ve been feeling under pressure, struggling with the realities of trying to set up a coaching business. I’ve never had to worry about marketing strategies, client funnels, Instagram algorithms or how to sell myself before. Now these are all things I need to learn, understand, get to grips with and make work. And I’m finding it hard work. It takes time. I have to learn lots of new stuff – and some of it (tax, liability insurance…) really does not excite me. And some of it feels very far removed from the bit that I do love, which is supporting people with my coaching.

Yes. The temptation to run and hide away from it all is strong.

Sometimes finding a hideaway – taking yourself away and spending some time cutting yourself off from the world – is A Good Thing. Especially when modern life can be so energy-sapping (the instant messages, the emails, the Instagram likes (or not), the diary appointments dictating your every move, the seemingly constant bad news reports). It’s why we have holidays. There are even laws about taking leave. It’s important to be able to rest. Recuperate. Recharge.

But staying hidden away all the time – to try and keep ourselves feeling safe, to stay comfortable – is not a good thing long term. In fact, it can become A Bad Thing. It can lead to stagnation. Our outlook becomes narrower. We lose confidence. There’s no change. No new.

Stepping out of your comfort zone and putting yourself in uncomfortable situations is scary, though. Even the thought of it can give us the ick. Why do it?

Because we gain new experiences. Meet new people. Make new connections. We learn. We’re more creative. We grow. We change. In a good way. In fact, psychological research literature is full of examples of how pushing yourself out of your comfort zone can be A Good Thing.  Not only can it help us learn and change, but it also better helps us to deal with the changes and transitions that life inevitably throws at us. We become more adaptable.

Ok, great. But that doesn’t change the fact that making that jump is still scary. And uncomfortable. And we feel vulnerable once we’re out in the open. I know – I get it. I am feeling all these things right now.

But there are ways we can make it a bit easier. Less daunting. There are ways we can create some safe spaces for ourselves. To try things out behind the curtains before stepping out onto the main stage.

Reach out to people that you trust and talk about your fears. Talk about what’s holding you back, what’s making you nervous. Grab a cuppa somewhere comfy with a group of friends, workmates, lovely people and test out your ideas with them. Do some research. Tap into every corner of your support network. Get advice from someone who’s already got expertise, who’s already been there and done it. Speak to someone you know is unbiased, honest and will gently challenge you to think differently. Use a coach. Use a mentor. Choose one small uncomfortable thing to tackle first, as a starter for ten, and build from there.

Time for me to seek out some of my own safe spaces for a short while, I think. Not to hide away but to actively get some reassurance, encouragement, and the nudges (maybe even big shoves) that I need to push through my discomforts and keep going. 

Time to make some calls.